My Space

As I sit and stare at the Opera House on a sunny Thursday afternoon in Sydney, my mind is taken to so many different places and spaces. I want to live in this moment again and again. I’m not sure how …

And then my laptop died. To me, a sign from the Universe to drink in that moment and write about it later. Remembering it now, it still feels like just as sweet of a space.  

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I feel as if I am neglecting my words like the VCR that slowly got replaced by the DVD player or the walkman that got tossed aside for the iPod. But every time I turn to them again it feels like an old, familiar, and comforting friend. My words are the ratty t-shirt you wear to sleep that has a hole and some permanent stains but still feels just right. Even when things steal my attention (Facebook Live) or make it difficult for me to write (broken laptop) I still know in my heart this is my purest form of expression, therapy, joy and creation. My words are my space. 

So here I am, on a Sunday night, with my ever looming to-do list and my stack of ungraded papers. My apartment is clean, my workout is complete and my inbox is empty- all of which give me great satisfaction. But my words are still looming waiting to form and reflect. My words still give me the deepest satisfaction I can ask for and that’s how I know they are my truth and my space.

Most of the time I know what I am going to write before I write it but every so often I just let it come naturally. I feel as if the past month of my life has been a test- how much shit can you handle without losing your shit? How many unexpected twists and turns can the universe throw your way before you crumble? Thankfully, I feel as if the past two years of my life have been preparing me to deal with this. Positivity is much more simple when things are going right, your life is falling into place and you seem to be on an upward climb, but in the unexpected valleys that positive mindset is put to the test and my trusty companion anxiety quickly creeps back in.

And here is where I turn to words. Not only my own, but the words of other. I turn to one of the best books I have read in a long time, The Power of Now, for guidance and inspiration.

“When you are full of problems, there is no room for anything new to enter, no room for a solution. So whenever you can, make some room, create some space, so that you find the life underneath your life situation”

The situation you are in or experiencing is not your life. You are your life. You have an inherent strength and goodness that will take you past and through any roadblock that stands in your way. You have to surrender to the Universe, do your part and let the rest unfold. Wanting to have all the answers to our present, our past and our future is a terrible disease called human nature. What would be the point of living our lives if we knew exactly how they were going to turn out? Where would the joy lie? How could we find excitement? Why do we feel like we don’t have enough space for what we love?

There was a new moon this week and with it brought a whole new energy into my mind and into my life. Do you feel it, too? Not much has changed with my life situation but man, has my mind shifted. I feel re-enlightened by The Power of Now and the power our mind can have over every single aspect of our world. Like Steve Jobs said in his famous speech at Stanford in 2005,

you can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.”

You can not just trust in your dots when things are going your way. You have to trust in your dots unconditionally. Instead of asking, “why is this happening to me?” we should be asking, “what can I learn from this?”or “what is this teaching me for the future”?

It’s easy to say but it’s another thing to actually do. For me, the most precious gifts I have are writing, reflecting, sunshine, yoga and precious human connection. Luckily, I fill my life with a lot of those. Teaching, blogging, coaching, spending time with my friends, and working with my coaching team- I am never lacking in sources of inspiration, encouragement and sweat. I must make space for those things that bring me joy because they are my life underneath my life situation.

My words are my weapon against the future, my cure for the past and my ticket into the present. Sure, I can think about the past when I write, I can still dream about the future, but the magic happens when I sink my teeth deeply into right now. It’s my space. It’s unbelievable how often we hold the ticket to our own success. It’s like we are locked in a jail cell with the key around our neck screaming for someone to let us out. If only, we took the time to look down and into ourself, we would see the power has always been with us.

I am writing this to remind myself how simple the answers are. I am writing this to remind you the same. I am writing this because when I look back at this past week I am so proud of myself. I feel as if I have tapped back into the magic of the Universe and I need to make sure I remember what it feels like. My words are my ticket into right now. So, if you are reading this (future self and my loving friends) your dots are connecting. You have the key around your neck. You can’t give up when times get hard, you have to simply work harder to appreciate the simple joys of abundance that still surround you. Make space for the life underneath your life situation. Make space for joy, gratitude, laughter, sweat and courage. Listen to the people who love you. Stay focused on the big picture but never miss your life happening right now. Don’t neglect the things that bring you to life. There is always room for living. You are supposed to create your space. 

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