Everything I learned in my twenties

It’s a new decade! Did you think by mid-January you would escape people saying this? Sorry not sorry.

It just so happens that this decade 2010-2019 actually aligns perfectly with my twenties. Your twenties are a decade so many people look back with adoration, regret, nostalgia and various amounts of shame and laughter.

I am technically still in my twenties for another five months, but to celebrate the end of the decade and the start of a new one I thought I would dive back into my blog with some reflection of what I learned during this adventurous chapter.

 I don’t claim to have all the answers about being a twenty-something in fact at my first counseling appointment of 2020 my counselor said, “It seems like the more you know about yourself, the more you don’t know” and I couldn’t agree more. 

I don’t want to share with you all my wins, triumphs and trips although I think it is impossible to share my lessons without giving you some context. 

Everything I learned in my twenties

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Hey #Girlboss, is that you?

I have wanted to be a teacher my entire life. I used to set up my dolls and my brothers Ninja Turtles and teach them for hours. I remember never wanting to come downstairs from my playroom. I was the boss of the playroom and my imaginary classroom and I liked it that way. My mom came up one day and walked in on my class she said “Now Susannah, don’t be bossy students won’t respond to that.. Teach with your heart. They can feel it and then they will know who is boss.”

This time last year I was teaching full time in the public school system in New York. I got a long term subbing position in the inner city of my hometown and I remember feeling stressed, emotionally drained, under appreciated by my students, parents and administration. I felt like I couldn’t use my creativity in my curriculum and everything I was doing was being scrutinized. I was teaching to a test and left school many days crying. I have no idea how people stay positive and keep their sanity teaching in America the way the school system is now.

When I started coaching I had no idea what this hobby would turn into. I did it as a way to hold myself accountable to my own goals and inspire others plus make some money to cover my hefty student loan bills. Once I got more involved in the company, experienced the positivity and inspiration it has brought to my life and career and experienced the feeling of appreciation and gratification for the hard work and effort I put in. I quickly saw that this business fit with my personality and what I want from a career and from life. I felt that #girlboss coming out. I’ve made incredible friends through coaching and reconnected to people from all different parts of my life. I’m changing people’s lives and my own. Through personal development I have gained passion for being an entrepreneur and the courage to stand up for what I believe in. I am blessed to be living in Australia pursuing my teaching career in adult education and also building my coaching business. Traveling and being an entrepreneur have both opened my eyes to following MY path even if it’s not the path I expected.  “A #girlboss is someone who’s in charge of her own life. She gets what she wants because she works for it…You’re a fighter-you know when to throw punches and when to roll with them”

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Leaving the Land of Smiles

After a bit of a mishap in the flight department (I’ll skip the story due to my own embarrassment) we finally made it to Thailand and back to our favorite island, Ko Phi Phi. It was so strange to be back in Thailand after being in such a westernized culture for two weeks. But even more strange was how NORMAL it felt. It was normal to not understand anything going on around you, for men to be screaming “I LOVEEE YOU”, to see a family of four on the motorbike next to you and to see more 7-11’s on one street than in all of Australia. Since we had such a hard month in Bali and Australia we knew we would need time to kick up our feet and relax in Ko Phi Phi for our last week abroad. Hey, c’mon you can’t hate us for planning the best vacation ever. 😉

Unfortunately the weather in Thailand was not cooperating with us. We were there for 7 nights and we probably had two days of sunshine. Lots of rain and mud puddles which caused us to find recreational activities inside… There isn’t much to do on an island when the weather is bad, especially Ko Phi Phi. We kept ourselves entertained with lots of stories and laughs from our trip, food, and an adult beverage or two. I finally got the chance to meet up with my friend from high school, Fallon who started teaching in Thailand in March. It was so awesome to catch up with her, reminisce on life in Syracuse and bond over our unexplainable desire to find what we need out of life even if that means traveling all over the world to find it. As the rain fell the reality of the end of my journey getting closer and closer washed over me. We didn’t want to talk about moving home because that made it real. I was so excited to see my friends and family, meet my nephew, squeeze my puppy, eat real pizza and finally feel clean but I couldn’t help but hate having to leave behind this place that I have learned to call home.

Thailand is a magical place for many but for me it changed my life in a way I will always revere. Thailand taught me what it means to be myself. That is the most beautiful gift anyone can give you. By no means did I feel “lost” in life before, but Thailand opened my eyes to a world I needed so desperately to see. A world beyond sorority formals and football tailgates. A world where people don’t have shoes on their feet or have to share a small room behind their restaurant with 13 family members. A world full of dreamers, teachers, and travelers; young people who have the same desire to see new horizons as I do. Like I said in an earlier piece, I joined a club I didn’t know existed. There are so many people, so different than I am, who went to different unis, speak different languages, were raised in diverse situations that have the same fire burning inside of them. This fire can not be extinguished or “gotten out of your system”. There is a whole world full of people who want to experience life, other cultures, have heart to hearts at 3 am on cruise ships in Vietnam, explore ancient temples in Cambodia, eat traditional Indonesian food at 6 am with locals and talk to strangers about their lives simply because it matters. I am so grateful for each and every one of you I have met along the way and you have inspired me to continue dreaming, no matter what anyone thinks.

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Cheers, No worries. Cheers, No worries.

After Bali we jumped on a plane and headed to Australia. Once again I was in complete awe that this was not just a dream destination in the far off “future” but a plausible real experience happening….right now. After a whirlwind journey, a layover in Malaysia with some exceptional red velvet cake in the airport, a trip to duty free for some essentials (two bottles of Absolut) we finally arrived in Sydney. Due to a change in plans Jackie and I were using her parents timeshare and staying at the Marriott in Circular Quay, which is the tourist heart of Sydney with a two minute walk to the Sydney Harbor, Opera House and Sydney Harbor Bridge. Every restaurant, bar or activity we needed was either a short ferry ride away or within walking distance. Within minutes of being in Sydney we realized it was happy hour and we were starving, obviously this needed to be taken care of. It felt so weird to be a country with predominately white people, the signs were in English, and it was so clean I could eat my dinner off the sidewalk. Not to mention, there were so many attractive young men in business suits Jackie and I thought we may have to cut the trip short due to a heart attack. We met a group of people whose office building was close by and they came to this place often for happy hour. They gave us tons of advice about Sydney, Australia, and we enjoyed many laughs and cocktails. We were very grateful for their hospitality and they put a great taste in our mouth for Australia. The next five days in Sydney were a whirlwind of beautiful beaches, incredible food, extremely friendly people, picture perfect waterfront towns and one of the most badass cities I’ve ever encountered. I could seriously go on forever so I’ll stick to the highlights.

Walk from Coogee to Bondi Beach – Favorite part of Sydney! This also included the unique art exhibit Sculptures by the Sea. This was one of the most breathtaking 5 kilometers I have ever experienced. There are about 6-7 separate beaches along this ocean front path and each one was unique. Some had huge sand beaches, others were covered with rocks and cliffs. Each one was worth lingering on and as Jackie and I walked we talked about the world, our lives, our travels, just our average heart to hearts except in one of the prettiest locations ever.
Tarango Zoo– We got our fix of koala bears, kangaroos, wombats, crazy reptiles and our favorite the giraffes. Not only was this an awesome zoo it also overlooked Sydney Harbor giving the animals one of the best views of the city. Worth the trip.
Manly– A little neighborhood a short ferry ride away from the Circular Quay. Perfect water and beaches and you instantly feel like you are a in a suburb you could raise three kids, drive your Mommy Lexus and go to the Farmer’s Market on Sundays. We wandered through the streets picturing our future lives and landed at Little Manly, a picture perfect beach with about 5 other people on it.
Watson’s Bay– A ritzy suburb with a similar feel to Manly just add a few zeros to the residents bank account. We enjoyed an awesome brunch at the Dunbar House and soaked up the sunshine, despite the frigid wind.
Darling Harbour– Cute area with tons of restaurants, bars, shopping, the aquarium, animal center and various other tourist attractions. Jackie and I decided to post up at a waterfront beer garden and enjoy some of the famous hard cider and specialty beers.
Sydney Sky Tower– Sydney’s tallest structure (1,014 feet) with an awesome view of the city. Worth the trip! Wish we could have done the Sky Walk!
Pitt Street Mall– Adorable outdoor shopping mall that has everything a 20 something female could possibly desire, including handsome Australian man singing acoustic live music while you shop.

Overall, we did an awesome job playing tourist in Sydney. We brought flashpackin’ to a whole new level and I’ll never forget the question, “So you’re backpacking that’s cool…where are you staying?” “The Marriott”….. Shoutout to Pie Face for saving our stomachs and our budgets and all of the very generous Australian fellows who provided us those 12 dollar cocktails that we clearly couldn’t afford. I am awed by the friendly culture, cleanliness and overall badness of Sydney and I can’t wait to visit again. Then our trip led us to the other powerhouse city, Melbourne. We quickly found out from our Aussie friends before we even got to Australian there is a serious rivalry between the two cities. I am not sure how uniform this sentiment is across the Australian population, but in my own personal experience, you either love one or the other. It’s kind of like the New York/LA debate but on steroids with a tinge more animosity. Jackie and I were excited to experience both cities and form our own opinions.

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More Than A Something

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Try as I may, being published on Thought Catalog still eludes me. Sadly I fear it’s due to the anti-stereotypical format of my pieces. I can’t bring myself to succumb to the dreaded lists! I am sharing this on my own blog because I think my thoughts are worth sharing! Today is also my 1 year blogging anniversary (thanks for the notification WordPress). No better way to celebrate than a new post that means a lot to me! I went back and read my first post and I truly can’t believe how much I have changed over the course of this year. This experience is so different than my expectations and I have gained more than I could possibly put into words. I have met incredible friends that will be a part of my heart forever and made enough memories for a lifetime. I hope you have enjoyed reading about my journey as much as I have enjoyed writing about it. I can’t believe how fast time goes by! I only have two months left in The Land of Smiles! “The days are long but the years are short”. Read & heed my message, whether you are apart of Generation Y or simply young at heart. 🙂 Cheers! xx 


More Than A Something 

Thanks to the eccentric depiction of “twenty somethings” in today’s society; whether it be blogs splattered all over the internet, television series, films or simply trendy hashtags such as #postgradproblems, twenty something has been turned into an exceptionally stereotyped and dare I say dreaded age group. Most twenty something’s are graduating college, searching for our first “real jobs”, finding our purpose, hooking up, breaking up, making shit up and eventually getting married, buying homes, paying bills, having kids and slipping quickly into adulthood.

It seems like just yesterday we were getting ready for theme parties, eating at the dining hall, planning our outfits for the football tailgate or staying up all night in the library. I’m not sure if it’s just my friends, my acquaintances, or my alma mater (LET’S GO MOUNTAINEERS!) but transitioning from “the wonder years” of college and turning into a “real person” is a difficult transition (to put things lightly). Unfortunately, social media has turned into a barometer for insecure twenty something’s to stack up their life against their peers. Who has the coolest job? Who’s engaged? Who’s having a baby? The real question should be WHO CARES? Turn the focus on who you are and who you want to be. I promise you will feel much better about your life. Many of the articles about twenty somethings depict us as angst ridden, awkward human beings who lack the hutzpah to get out there and grab the bull by the horns. I beg to differ.

Personally, I would like to defend not only myself, but also the majority of my fellow twenty somethings. I am not saying we aren’t angsty sometimes. We are definitely broke and we undoubtedly miss the carefree lifestyle of being university students. We may be heartbroken, we may be confused but I can tell you one thing; we can thrive dwelling in the possibilities.

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Share your Lollipops

Inspiration is a perplexing concept. We draw inspiration from others and the world around us but ultimately inspiration is a highly personal experience. You can read the same book or watch the same film as your friend, lover, or mother and draw totally different inspiration from the same source. Some people are extremely difficult to inspire and others are inspired by minute daily beauty. As a writer, inspiration is something that is not only necessary but is truly like kryptonite. When I feel the words forming in my head, I can see the sentences budding like flowers in the springtime. When I feel the inspiration and the drive to condense my vast imagination into compartmentalized fuel…I must fulfill that need. Often I am inspired by other writers, reading their books and getting so lost in their created world I just can’t wait to create a world of my own. Often I am inspired by writers’ quotes or interviews about writing. I feed off their immense satisfaction with written words and begin to muse over what I can construct myself. As an educator, I am writing SOMETHING every single day. I have recently started a gratitude journal and it is remarkable way to write at least one (usually about 7 or 8) bullet points of little things I am grateful for that particular day. Here is a quick recap of what I have been extremely grateful for in the past few weeks.

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  • My health– Celebrating my 24th birthday on June 2nd was a wonderful reminder of how lucky I am to continue to grow older. Not to mention my IMMENSE infatuation with birthdays. I love making people feel special and birthdays are a great excuse to celebrate something (YOU). Seems like a common Gemini trait!;)  I also have made a commitment to myself to put my physical health- exercise and diet back at the top of my priority list. Endorphins are my drug of choice and they have been neglected a bit in my adjustment to my new world/ traveling the world. Sixty days of Insanity began this week and I am excited to challenge myself physically and mentally! I’m even dragging Jackie & Maggie along with me! 😉
  • My students- These little loves challenge me every single day and especially test my patience. But they are incredibly thoughtful, creative and kind. I got not one or two but FIVE birthday cakes on my birthday and countless presents. I was treated like a queen and it was totally unexpected but greatly appreciated. Once again Thailand surprised me with its ability to make me feel right at home on special days, holidays and random ordinary days.
  • Good food– You may laugh at this one. BUT IT’S TRUE! After a weekend in Bangkok with incredible western food including brunch at Roast BKK(Thonglor district, GO if you are visiting Bangkok), juicy burgers, gourmet salads, sushi, daily fresh pineapple sold on the street outside my apartment, you name it, I have been eating like a queen and nothing feeds my foodie soul quite like a GREAT meal with GREAT friends! J
  • Good shows– Current Obsessions: Games of Thrones, Orange is the New Black, Modern Family. Laughing, drinking wine, and covering my eyes & gasping (A LOT) with my gal pals is a favorite past time lately.
  • My innumerable “lollipop moments” (I’ll explain later) and all of the incredible people who are attached to them. I am definitely what you call a “people person” Besides food; people are probably my favorite thing about life. I try to be as proactive as possible as I can about thanking those people who have helped me throughout my life. I try to do this as often as possible. I can’t leave my thanks unspoken. Currently I am thinking of wonderful teachers who have helped me along my journey; my parents, Chapman, Mr. & Mrs. P, Barrett, Kiesha Kiebler, Stephanie Lorenze, John Stallings and many teachers I never formerly had in a classroom, my big brothers, Lisa & Dave Craig, Punkie& Dickie Lighton, Krista & Zach Mendelson and many more whose influence cannot be forgotten. My friends, the very old and new; you are my shining stars. I can’t think you enough for your love, laughter, guidance, empathy and companionship. Thanks for your lollipop moments; you have touched my heart and life in ways that will never be forgotten.

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The Grass is Always Greener…

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The past month or so has been very eventful!(I PROMISE I WILL KEEP UP BETTER SOON!) After 2 weeks of summer school we got off an unexpected extra week. Fortunately for me, I already requested the time off because my boyfriend planned a visit from America! That meant I still got the time off and I got back 5 extra vacation days to use in the upcoming semester! The odds started out in my favor! After over six months apart, the anticipation of seeing my boyfriend at the airport was unexplainable. Luckily he was wearing a huge flying WV shirt so I could pick him out of the crowd (not to mention he was a 6’3 white boy in an predominately Asian airport). After traveling for over 2 days he was surprisingly energetic and now I could share the fact that we still had a full day of traveling ahead of us to the reach the southern island of Koh Tao. After a hot and sweaty journey by plane, bus, ferry, and overpriced taxi, we arrived at our secluded resort on the private Tanote Beach. It was about a 15-minute cab ride from the pier, but the ride was well worth the seclusion and beautiful atmosphere. The next few days were spent talking, laughing, snorkeling, eating, drinking, and frolicking in the ocean. We went on a one-day snorkel tour to Shark Bay, Mango Bay and ended the trip at Koh Nang Yuan Island. Although it felt hotter than the Sahara Desert, we still climbed up all the steps to the viewpoint. The view was well worth the sweat! It was absolutely breathtaking. We ended up meeting up with two of our friends from home that happened to be on the same island. It was awesome to hang out with fellow Mountaineers! The boys spent the day deep-sea fishing, caught a bunch of fish and the hotel’s staff served us up an amazing dinner overlooking the ocean; stir-fry with the fresh fish, veggies, rice and wine. It was probably my favorite meal of the trip! If you visit Koh Tao make sure you stop by Fishbowl Bar and the burger stand that is right outside of the bar Chopper’s (Sairee Beach). Both were favorites that we visited multiple times in six days! Koh Tao definitely lived up to the hype, but I have a feeling it may have to do with who and not where I was.

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