How to not give up this time.. even if you already did

Do you feel frustrated with yourself? Maybe you already broke your “resolution” for the new year or you “gave in” to Netflix and wine instead of what you thought you should be doing. Maybe you didn’t write down any goals but you still feel “the same” and you can’t figure out why? Or did you go in full force and now you feel like you failed because you’ve already skipped the gym for a couple days? Did you succumb to the persuasive power of Ben and Jerry again? Now is the time most people are quitting when the shiny glow of the new year starts to fade. How do you make yourself part of the group that didn’t give up this time…even if you already did?

STOP RIGHT THERE! Take a deep breath.

The new year is an awesome time to start chasing after new goals but the amazing part is, we get a clean slate everyday. You have the power to rewrite your story, every single day. The question is will you let yourself? Are you hiding behind fear? Let’s get to the bottom of this so you can figure out how not to give up this time.

Celebrate progress– Progress comes in many forms- small and large. Saying no to cookies in the staff room or choosing to take a deep breath instead of lose it on your partner- that’s progress. Even if it’s one time! Find something that you feel like was a success everyday and start building on that.

Acknowledge your power- When we give up on our goals we try to place blame on everything around us. I’m too busy, I’m just not good at eating healthy, I have no willpower. How many times can you feed yourself excuses before you begin to acknowledge that that is exactly what they are. Lying is awful and when you lie to yourself, you’re wasting everyone’s time and energy especially your own. YOU HAVE THE POWER. You always have. Act like it.

Try new things– If the same gym membership and Lean Cuisine diet isn’t doing it for you and it hasn’t for the past five years, why do you keep thinking this time will be different? If you want different results DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT. Don’t just say, “Yeah, that would be nice.” “Someday.” DO it now, for goodness sake. If you hate it, then at least you tried!

Non-food rewards– You are not a dog. You do a trick, you get a treat? Come on. Even if you LOVE food (trust me- so do I) try rewarding yourself with things other than food. Manicures, facials, massages, a bubble bath, new workout gear, or a Groupon for a fun and active date night.  Branch out. Stop saying okay, I ran 3 miles now I shall eat my body weight in pizza. You are not a pet, don’t treat yourself like one.

Allow yourself to quit– What? This sounds silly. No, it’s not. If you sign up for Crossfit and you end up HATING Crossfit, do yourself a favor and find something you do like. Human beings were born to MOVE, so I promise you there is something that will feel good for your body. Don’t see exercise as a punishment but as a gift and blessing.

Find your tribe– MAN. I don’t know how many times I can say this. Find people who motivate you. Find people who don’t sit around on the couch every night. Find people who want to plan the trip, take the class, run the race, start the business. Fire breeds fire. Find people who make you HOT!

Ask for help– You don’t have to do ANYTHING alone. If you are struggling with mental health issues, see a doctor. If you are struggling with your relationship- ask a friend or someone you trust for advice. If you can’t get your diet and exercise under control SEEK HELP! There are experts in every area of your life you want to improve and you’re probably already friends with them. It doesn’t have to be paid advice or programs, just seek out what you need and be open minded!
Be flexible– You should NEVER be so set in your ways that you hinder yourself from finding and creating the life of your dreams. This goes along with trying new things, allowing yourself to quit and asking for help. Be flexible. ALLOW yourself to grow. Don’t feel like you MUST do what you have always done. It’s so incredibly sexy and fulfilling to better yourself. HOP ON BOARD.

Continual Forgiveness– Alright, you messed up? Welcome to the club. Seriously, it will never be an uphill progression. It’s a roller coaster. Be kind to yourself. I don’t like to say be “easy” on yourself because that leaves  a lot of room for excuses. Be kind but firm. Alright, beauty you messed up- let’s do better tomorrow. YOU GOT THIS.

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How to make 2017 your best year yet

It’s been a week long series of the 2016 collection. I hope this week brought you some insight, inspiration and friendly reminders to find what makes you happy, treat your body right and never stop exploring the world around you.

As we kick off 2017 one of my goals is to take my blog to the next level. I’ve had this blog for 3 years now. It started as a minor project, a simple way to keep in touch with friends and family when I moved to Thailand. I had no idea what the course of these next 3 years would be;  how deeply I would fall in love with traveling and sharing my storying, and that I would ultimately move from Thailand to New York and down under to Australia. In the past 3 years I have had my heartbroken and found myself in the aftermath, started my own business, taught 3 different aged students in 3 different countries, fallen in love, met hundreds of new and inspiring souls, went skydiving(twice) , conquered my fear by scuba diving at the Great Barrier Reef, traveled to five countries, backpacked all around South East Asia and Australia, been published on one of my favorite websites, grew my passion for exercise, yoga, writing and helping people, welcomed my nephew into the world, fallen in love with myself again and again and most importantly felt more alive than I ever have in my life.

 

In 2017, I want to shift my focus a bit, I still plan to keep you up to date with my journey and sharing my story but I want to help you to write your own. Maybe that’s in the traditional sense of starting a gratitude journal or your own blog or maybe that’s just getting in touch with where you’ve been, where you are, and where you are going. My focus this year is helping YOU grow. I’ve started my first newsletter to give a monthly bonus to subscribers plus special freebies, offers, advice, etc. Make sure you subscribe to stay up to date! I will reserve special content for the newsletter but it will always fit in with the theme of the blog posts happening that month!

So, in honor of January and goal setting- let’s get your year off on the right track.  Resolutions have a negative connotation because so many people set them and forget them or people say things they think they should change but don’t really feel invested in. I am not sure if you are familiar with the term “S.M.A.R.T goals” but I would love to give the quick and dirty refresh.

Goals need to be S.M.A.R.T for them to work

S- Specific (what exactly will you do)

M- Measurable (how will you know you have reached the goal)

A- Achievable (something that can be done)

R- Realistic (Is this too big? Can I really do it?)

T- Timely (when will I do this by)

So instead of saying “I need to get in shape” try making a SMART Soul Solution- “I will improve my health by exercising four times per week every week. I will measure my success by the amount of inches I lose and how my clothes fit. I will  mark on the calendar when I workout and check in with myself every month and make sure I’m sticking to my goal.”

 

YOU CAN CHANGE! We all have the ability to change. It’s about being aggressive and persistent in changing our habits. I also love the idea of having ONE goal in all the major areas of your life. Don’t try to change it all at once. Don’t discredit that every day is a tiny step in the right direction. One day doesn’t make or break you but one day plus one day plus one day turns into weeks and months of change. Little by little, bit by bit, you will look back and see how far you have come.

 

No matter what your goals are I have some serious and realistic tips for sticking to them.

 

 

  • TALK THEM OUT. Make sure they measure up to the S.M.A.R.T.
  • WRITE THEM DOWN.  Writing things down is powerful in so many ways.
  • HANG THEM UP. You have to look at them frequently. Above your desk, on your mirror, on your fridge!
  • SCHEDULE THEM IN. Make a plan. It’s hard enough to change habits, without a specific plan it’s hopeless.
  • STAY FOCUSED. If you want it, block out anything that stands in your way FOCUS is powerful.
  • HAVE FUN. Goal setting can be intimidating but shit, girlfriend- working on you should be fun. Have a sense of humor about it and remember trying and failing is better than staying stuck.

 

 

I’ll leave you with an awesome quote from one of the best books I’ve ever read The Magic of Thinking Big by David Joseph Schwartz:

 

“You are what you think you are. Think more of yourself and there is more of you.”

 

Your mind is your most powerful muscle. Cheers to a fabulous new year, but not a new you. We can improve things about you, but remember I like you just the way you are. You should too! There are endless possibilities when you look out into the future, focus those gorgeous eyes on a few and let’s do this thing. 

 

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